I think I'm giving up on my NaNoWriMo story. It's the biggest piece of shit ever, no one in their right mind would pick it up to look at, let alone read or ENJOY. :/ It's plotless and cliche and retardeeeeed.

It's really upsetting, but...I dunno. I just don't know what else to do. I'm not a good writer and I don't think I can do it....not for this month, not for next year, not for a living. Not ever.

I have five days total of NOTHING written. I'm so far behind it isn't even funny and my writer's block has been accumulating since day one.

Jesus...this sucks, you know?

Trying really hard not to make this into a pity-party journal. -_- Sorry if that's what it sounds like, I promise it wasn't intentional.

I'm just really sad that I won't be able to finish this. I'm sad that it isn't worth finishing. I'm worried that I'll never have anything worth finishing.

Well, some other time then, guys.

p.s. Cast party was amazing. We hung out with Steven after Ariel and I left, and I went and spent the night with her. Soooo much fun. LOL And I can't wait to be a senior~ Hell yeah.

Edit:: Now that I'm over the initial depression of being a failure and abandoning my precious Cadence, I'm able to feel much more free to do things like gorge on Ergo Proxy and Bleach, go to concerts with friends (friends who should tell me when they're playing again cuz Patrick wants to know lol), and take four-hour naps in the middle of the day. It's fabulous. LOL

I'm reasonably certain that Cadence will have his story told eventually, but I'm rather resigned to the fact that other things may need to be written first. Other stories might have priority over his, but I still love him and would never forgive myself if I never finished his story.